Guess the inspirational speaker! Win a prize!

Can You Guess Who I Grew Up to Be? (This quiz is from a Cracker Jack prize.)

"I was the second of eight children born into a strict Quaker family. My father was a stern man who taught us self-discipline and to believe in our own self-worth. I was an intelligent child, learning to read and write by the time I was three. As a Quaker, I was taught that all people were equal, regardless of gender or race, a belief not shared by most people at the time. In fact, because I was a woman, I never had the legal right to vote in my lifetime."

I'll send a copy of my e-book "101 Tips to Improve Your Public Speaking" to the first three people who guess correctly.

P.S. I guessed it on my first try. :-)

Seasoned to perfection

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As a companion to the post on the Top Chef contestant who had a problem cooking for cowboys, I thought I'd write another chef-centric post, this one about salt.

In the October issue of Gourmet Magazine, there's an article by Grant Achatz, Chef/Owner of Alinea (a restaurant in Chicago), about seasoning. Specifically, the article is about refusing to put salt and pepper on the table, in the belief that the kitchen has seasoned the food perfectly and the chef knows best.

"As a young cook, fresh from cutting my teeth in a diner and moving on to the world of haute cuisine, I thought it was cool that the chef had ultimate control over his food. It was his or her vision, from the kitchen to the diner's mouth. I recognized the element of ego in this choice, and I admit that I liked it."

"I have heard chefs say that they cook only for themselves, that their creations are the result of selfish thinking. They are the artists, and who can understand the vision or intent of the work better? If anyone disagrees, they are dismissed as amateur, rude or simply 'not getting it.'

...But if you put the artist part aside and think of the chef as a craftsman who has the obligation to cook for the public, it's a different story. Each person dining at Alinea on a given night evaluates the food differently. Though we like to push boundaries and love to control the meal so guests experience the restaurant as we intend, occasionally we have to compromise."

He goes on to say that, every now and then, there is a diner who requests salt. This sets off a chain of events where the dishes are tasted and retasted by everyone in the kitchen to make sure they are properly seasoned. Of course they are, but the server returns to the table with a salt shaker just the same. Because that's what the customer wants.

This is a constant fascination to me: The balance between providing what the customer wants and maintaining your own distinctive style and personality.

I have friends who are artists and craftspeople who face this every day. A customer wants something "tweaked" so it reflects her own style. The artist or designer struggles with giving in, "selling out," or saying no and maintaining integrity.

Just yesterday I read this on A Painter's Kitchen:

"Showing at galleries encourages reiteration. An artist is pressured to repeat herself. Do that thing you do. Then do it again. I have clients waiting. Fabric swatches. Not very nourishing to the artistic impulse for exploration. But once you hang work in a gallery- and once you sell- art is business. The creative process gets trimmed to fit. And once you get a check for a painting you thought you'd never part with because you needed to pay a medical bill, there is a certain piece of you now missing. And you sense it. You feel the dull weight of resignation (or disgust) bulge just a little."

"...But painting for yourself is hard. In the real world there is little support or interest in authenticity. It's not even on the radar. When is the last time you heard someone say their goal was to be authentic, or their dream was to become an original thinker?

And forget clients. They want a memory post card, something to accent the drapes, or mark their anniversary."

So here's my general question to my readers today, whether you're a speaker or a chef: How do you balance authenticity, creativity and personal vision with the needs and desires of the varied audiences you serve? Please share in the comments.

There is no such thing as a dry topic

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I've heard from my clients who are engineers, finance people, doctors and scientists that their topics are dry and boring, that their audiences want tons of data, and that there's no way to make their presentations interesting.

They could not be more wrong.

A topic is dry when the writer or speaker makes it that way. Let me share the example of my high school geometry textbook.

The book introduced two characters named Obtuse Ollie and Acute Alice. They would perform experiments that were analogies for the math problems we were trying to solve. The interaction of these two characters was just one example of the kind of humor and engagement that the book used. Here's one of their challenges (make sure you're on page 317):


Geometry: seeing, doing, understanding By Harold R. Jacobs

This textbook uses art by M.C. Escher, Peanuts^® cartoons, games (including a math game from a 1917 paperback), graphic design, a measure from a musical piece by Bach, the image of a batter's swing, stories, examples from history (tapestries, a silver vase, bridges, etc.) and more.

I was never a top math student, but this class was one of my most enjoyable and most memorable -- and not because of the teacher. This book made all the difference in my interest and ability to learn geometry.

I sat with a client last week who was going to be giving a presentation on cloud computing, a technical topic for an audience who was going to be new to the concept. Going through his slides, I noticed that he had a slide that spelled out the definition of cloud computing.

I suggested he interview people at the conference in the day before his presentation and ask them what they thought "cloud computing" might mean. Then, in the presentation, use the more confusing or humorous responses as definitions of what cloud computing is NOT. That way, he could kick off the talk with some light humor to get the audience engaged before he got into the nitty gritty of the topic.

As a speaker, what stereotypes about your topic are you clinging to? That science can't be interesting? That finance is boring? That insurance puts people to sleep? You can change that. It just takes some creativity, some willingness to challenge the status quo and, as always, your own passion for your topic.

You bring the energy. You bring the enthusiasm. You make it what you want it to be. I'll say it again -- there is no such thing as a dry topic!

Share your examples of presentations you've seen or given that broke the mold of a typical dry topic.

My Podcast Alley feed! {pca-772828fe46b8a35cd7843b88701df339}

Public speaking group coaching in Santa Barbara...

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Pass the word along and if you have questions or want to sign up, contact me!

Words and actions in alignment

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I was reading an article on The Positivity Blog, when I was struck with #9 on the list of Gandhi’s Top 10 Fundamentals for Changing the World:

9. Be congruent, be authentic, be your true self.

Followed by two quotes by Gandhi:

"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony."

"Always aim at complete harmony of thought and word and deed. Always aim at purifying your thoughts and everything will be well."

I'm a big fan of authenticity. In fact, I'm one of those coaches who will tell you to "be yourself," or "just be," a concept that my pal and fellow trainer Laura Bergells thinks is poppycock.

I've written articles about how to discover your own personality and style, how to discover what makes you unique, and falling in love with the real you.

But these Gandhi quotes sent me in a different direction today. A direction that Albert Mehrabian was going in all those years ago!

What I hope to be as a speaker and to see in a speaker is a person who is congruent. When "what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." When a speaker is congruent, they gain trust.

A large part of engaging an audience and making your message memorable is in gaining trust with the audience. When, in simple terms, your words and your actions don't match, there is a disconnect. When what you say and what you do don't match, the audience is confused. The audience may perceive you to be insincere, they may perceive you to be hiding something, or they may not know what to think at all.

But they will not connect with you, and they probably will not trust you.

As Laura Bergells points out, human beings are complex. Frequently, we can't even make sense of our own thoughts and actions, because knowing and understanding ourselves is a lifelong process. For a person to be completely congruent all the time, with thoughts, words and actions in alignment, that person would have to be completely self-actualized.

However, to reach a desired level of trust with an audience, congruence is critical. Don't portray yourself as open, warm and approachable onstage and then run out the door the minute the presentation is over, for example.

Authenticity and congruence go hand in hand. Being yourself means portraying yourself as you are, showing the world who you are in words and in actions. When your message and your person are aligned, you are more believable, more trustworthy and more credible. And why would you want it any other way?

A suspenseful moment...

Want to get your audience's attention? Engage them with a story!

That's what the Ad Council is doing right now in a television and radio campaign to promote lifelong literacy, sponsored by the Library of Congress.

Listen to this radio spot they're running:



From the Ad Council site:

"This campaign was created with the Library of Congress in an effort to inspire young readers to become lifelong learners. The objective is to inspire fun and promote literacy in all types of learning. From books to magazines to comics and all other forms, reading really gives kids the opportunity to explore their imaginations.

The PSAs invite kids to 'Explore New Worlds. Read.' Viewers are also encouraged to visit www.Literacy.gov, and explore the Library of Congress site including The Storybook Adventure activity created for this campaign."

The PSA uses a dramatic reading of a suspenseful moment in the book... to learn more, you must go get the book and read it!

This is a great tool to use in a presentation as well. Start your presentation with an exciting story to pique the audience's curiosity and interest ... and make sure to tell them how the story ends before you're done!

Check out more of the Ad Council literacy PSAs here.

Is your presentation bad or just ineffective?

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There's a difference between a bad presentation and an ineffective one. A lot of people give ineffective presentations; most are not actually "bad."

Here's what I consider ineffective:

The content is interesting, but the speaker is dull.

The speaker is interesting, but the content is disorganized.

The speaker's content and delivery are acceptable, but the slides are overloaded with detail and impossible to read.

The speaker hasn't researched the audience, so the content isn't a good fit.

The speaker isn't well prepared, so the presentation rambles.

Do you see what I'm getting at? An ineffective presentation has elements of an effective presentation, but the speaker sabotages herself by not fully preparing or not fully committing to a successful outcome.

A "bad" presentation is actually pretty difficult to pull off. There have to be many elements of ineffective presentations all at once: monotone speaker, text-heavy slides, disorganization, inappropriate content, etc.

Is it better to be "off" in just one area than in every area? Of course! However, a bad presentation is at least memorable for how bad it was. An ineffective presentation just doesn't make an impact at all.

So if you're concerned about giving a bad presentation, you can relax a little. It's not as easy as you think. An ineffective presentation is much easier to put together, much more common than a bad presentation, and much more forgettable.

Pay attention to the details and, if you need some help, download my Presentation Readiness Checklist and Presentation Tools Checklist to make sure you're on the right track.

Notes on the Emmys

Last night, I watched one of the more enjoyable awards shows I can remember. There was a feeling of lightheartedness and fun in the room that I haven't seen for a long time, if ever.

Host Neil Patrick Harris had energy, personality and a sense of fun that carried the evening. He was silly, charming and, if possible, self-effacing and jokingly pompous at the same time (for losing to Jon Cryer). And his musical opening number showed a side of him that most of us haven't seen.

The winning speeches seemed to follow a similar pattern: fun, heartfelt, passionate and humorous. Some of my favorite moments:

As nominees for best supporting actress in a comedy were announced, each one was shown wearing some sort of silly glasses. Kristin Wiig nearly killed me when she pulled out a monacle, then slowly added a pipe.

When the camera cut to Sarah Silverman, being announced as a nominee for best actress in a comedy, she sat serenely in her seat, straight-faced, wearing a mustache. When the award when to another actor, she glared angrily at the stage. Hilarious.

Jon Cryer, supporting actor in a comedy, winning his first Emmy after four nominations:

"I used to think that awards were just tokens of momentary popularity. But now I realize they are the only true measure of a person's real worth as a human being. So, thank you."

Jeff Probst, reality show host:

"I also want to share this with anybody who has a dream, because I am living my dream right here in this moment. If you have a dream, dream big; pursue it with a passion. In the words of the great storyteller Joseph Campbell, 'The adventure you're ready for is the one you get.' Life is short -- go for it!"

Ken Howard, supporting actor in a made-for-tv movie, first offered to "speed it up as to not be interrupted by a congressmen or a rapper," then thanked stuntwoman Jeannie Epper for donating a kidney to him nine years ago.

Dearbhla Walsh, director of the miniseries "Little Dorrit," thanked her family in Ireland for investing in cable and staying up to watch the Emmys in the middle of the night.

And always one of my favorite speech-makers, Tina Fey (here's what she said last year), winning for best comedy show, said to her co-producer:

"I want to work with you every day until I put you in the ground."

Actors are not always good speech makers (see here and here), but last night everyone seemed to be relaxed and having fun, the best way to ensure an effective speech!

Image: CBS Television - www.cbs.com/specials/emmys

Personal style vs. serving your audience

Listen to the audio here

Last night on Top Chef, one of the contestants had this to say about the challenge of cooking over a campfire for desert ranchers:

"I don't necessarily think I should change the way I cook for the people I'm cooking for. Cowboys are cowboys. I'm not cooking for the cowboys, though. When a guest comes into your restaurant, you don't create a menu based on where they come from. You cook your food and they either like it or they don't."

I don't entirely disagree. The way he cooks is his personal style. He shouldn't change that for anyone, because that's what makes him unique.

However, these cowboys aren't coming to his restaurant. This challenge is more like a catered event where the chef is indeed working for the people he's cooking for. He may not need to change his cooking style, but he does need to change his attitude.

After all, this is a competition. The judges want to know who can best execute the spirit of the challenge: cooking over open campfires in the desert for ranchers who work hard all day. Does the food taste good and also suit the needs of the ranchers?

The show wouldn't devise such challenges if the chefs were going to be allowed to cook whatever they wanted in every challenge, with the perfect ingredients and the comforts of their home kitchens. They do that every day in their own restaurants.

The judges are asking the contestants to open their minds, stretch their imaginations and abilities, and push themselves beyond what is comfortable. If they can achieve this and still make good food, they will succeed on the show.

Speakers face the same challenges, although not artificially created by a judging panel. Every speaking event is a chance to expand our efforts, to try new things and to find new and better ways to engage the audience and serve their needs. The more we stretch, the more we explore what makes our presentations successful with different audiences, the more success we will achieve.

An easy tip to customize your content

I watched part of Kevin Nealon's stand-up special, "Now Hear Me Out" last night, and I was struck by this one moment in the routine.

He's talking about picking baby names and using names of commercial products so that he can get his children sponsored through college.

He mentions Velveeta and Zoloft, then says he even considered "Keyes, Keyes, Keyes -- Keyes on Van Nuys!"

The show was taped in Hollywood, and Keyes on Van Nuys is a local Los Angeles auto dealership. (Listen to the jingle below.)



Mr. Nealon lives in L.A., and he's probably heard that jingle before. He probably didn't have to do much research to find a local advertisement that the audience would be familiar with.

However, this week he was performing in Tempe, Arizona. Do you suppose this joke would have the same impact on audiences in Tempe? Probably not!

This is the kind of subtle tweak that performers and speakers make, from gig to gig, to make sure that at least some of their content is customized to the group.

It's as simple as watching some local television or picking up a local newspaper. Find some local tidbits that fit into your presentation or routine and freshen up your material for each audience.

I wonder what ubiquitous local commercial he inserted into his Tempe show...

Visual improv activity

I can't wait to use this exercise in one of my workshops. So much fun and so effective at forcing people to think on their feet -- but in a fun way!

Cliff Atkinson's Visual Improv Exercise from Lisa Braithwaite on Vimeo.

Are you on fire?

At yesterday's referrals group meeting, everyone was on fire! Introductions were funny and clever, 10-minutes speeches were entertaining, and everyone seemed to have extra energy and enthusiasm.

The 30-second commercials were especially entertaining. Here are some examples.

Melanie Tunnell, a seamstress (after briefly describing her business): "I sew. What can I say?" I think this got the biggest laugh of the day.

Sheri Mize, an interior designer: "I merge couples, I separate couples..."

Calla Gold, a jeweler: "I'll check your prongs..."

Teri Breier, a copywriter: "Call a higher power; call the writing goddess!"

Stephanie Burris, an optometrist, playing off both Calla's theatricality and Teri's "goddess" theme, gave an outlandish and colorful commercial, calling herself the "eye goddess," and waving her arms in a dramatic fashion modeled after Calla.

Ellen Lilley, a Shaklee representative (cleaning products, vitamins, etc.): "We need this kind of excitement every month...so don't get the flu!"

Our speakers were also creative. Nicole Clancy, a personal trainer, created a game show-type poster with the top ten excuses people give for not exercising. We attacked the excuses one by one, offering solutions for each, until there were no excuses left. Fun and effective learning!

Valerie Burns, an image consultant, handed out a quiz for each of us to assess our own effectiveness and comfort level with our professional appearance and relationship with our closets. It was a great way to get us thinking about where we could improve (cleaning out the closet more frequently, making sure we're not hanging onto clothes we never wear or that don't fit, for example), without judgment or putting individuals on the spot.

Connie Brown, a Send Out Cards consultant, had realized that there was no Internet access in the meeting room, so her future daughter-in-law Kimberly, a videographer, created a mock web tutorial in PowerPoint. The tutorial showed how easy it is to send a card when you don't have to shop for a card, find a stamp, and stand in line at the post office. It was a convincing presentation.

The people in this group are not professional speakers, but because they are open to constant improvement and willing to keep trying something new in describing how they help their clients, their presentations and introductions never get stale. Month after month, they find new ways to get their message across to a group who already knows what they do.

How do you keep your flame from sputtering out?

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You don't hate public speaking. You're doing it right now.

Let's talk about all the ways you "speak in public" every day.

You meet new people at a party.

You ask for help at Best Buy.

You run a meeting at work.

You ask a question at a meeting at work.

You order a sandwich at Subway.

You talk on your cell phone while you're walking down the street.

You persuade your coworkers to adopt a new practice.

You tell a story while hanging out with your friends.

You publish posts on a blog, tweets on Twitter or messages on Facebook that reach hundreds or thousands of people.

Technically, the definition of public speaking involves presenting to a group of people in a structured setting with an outcome in mind. But all of the above examples involve you speaking out loud in front of people.

So why is it so much more nervewracking when you prepare content for a predetermined presentation to a group of people?

1. You're afraid of forgetting what you were going to say.

Hmmm. Doesn't that happen every day in conversations with your friends and coworkers? But in that setting, it's not the end of the world if you lose your place in a story. You just back up and keep going. You can do this in a presentation, too. The audience won't judge you any more than your friends will. In fact, the audience will be a lot nicer about it than your friends!

2. You're afraid of being judged.

You post comments to the world on Twitter and Facebook, and talk to your boyfriend on the phone while sitting in Starbucks, and certainly people are judging you. We all judge each other all the time; it's a fact of life. But that doesn't mean that people aren't supportive and interested in what you have to say.

The reality is that people form impressions of you based on what you say, what you write, how you dress, how you do your hair. There's no way to escape it, so be who you are, face your audience with confidence and let go of the concern for what people think of you.

3. You're afraid of looking foolish.

You ask for help all the time. You ask for directions, you ask which router is better than another one, you ask the postal clerk which shipping method is fastest or least expensive. You're not expected to know everything in the "real world," so why do you pressure yourself to know everything when you're giving a presentation?

Of course, you're the expert on your topic, and you should know what you're talking about. But nobody knows everything about everything. There are probably people in the audience who know things that you don't know. So why not incorporate that into your presentation?

Embrace the learning that comes with a diverse audience. Ask them to share their experiences and knowledge. If you don't know something, say so and ask if anyone else has an answer. No big deal.

4. You're afraid of being boring.

Guess what: No one wants to hear your cell phone conversation, either. That's really boring to most people. But when you're speaking to an audience, they've come specifically to hear you speak. They want to hear what you have to say. So right there, you're already ten times more interesting than to most people you encounter in a day!

Now just make sure that you've learned about your audience and taken into account what they care about and what they want to know. Make sure that you've researched what makes them tick, and make sure that you've thought of some ways to interact with them so the whole presentation isn't about you. You will not be boring. I promise.

These are just a few examples of how the "public speaking" you do every day translates over into a formal presentation. Give it some thought, and you'll realize that you're always speaking in public. How can you take that information and apply it in other settings?

Audience's facial expressions affect our language

BPS Research Digest recently published an article on how the facial expression of a listener affects the way the speaker uses language. Here's an excerpt:

"Audiences differ. Talk to one person and your words are welcomed by a smile and nod of acknowledgment. Speak to another, less winsome listener and your words are confronted by a frown and folded arms. According to Camiel Beukeboom, these different responses systematically alter your use of language. Speak to a positive listener and you'll likely use more abstractions and subjective impressions, whilst if you talk to a negative listener you'll probably find yourself sheltering in the security of objective facts and concrete details."

I find that I do work harder to prove my points when audience members looks skeptical or closed-minded; when the audience appears to be "with me," smiling, nodding, accepting, I tend to go in a more emotional direction. I'm curious now to observe my future presentations more closely for the above-mentioned phenomenon.

Have you ever experienced this -- consciously -- as a speaker?

Read the full article here.

Did you bring batteries?

Here's a quick example of what I'm talking about when I harp on preparation over and over again.

Yesterday, as I set up my equipment for a presentation, I noticed that my remote wasn't working. I tried plugging the drive into different ports, but that wasn't the problem.

I realized that the batteries must be dead, so I pulled some batteries out of my bag and changed them.

Still dead.

Again, I switched ports, and nothing worked.

About to give up on the remote, I decided to try another set of batteries. Because, yes, I had about six extra batteries in my bag.

Guess what: The next set of batteries worked! The remote came to life and my presentation went on as planned.

I hope you always have a "Plan B" for whatever might go wrong. But do you also have a "Plan C?" Or even a "Plan D?" Think about every aspect of your presentation, not just your words. Think about your activities, your handouts, your equipment, your venue, your props, your business cards, your hydration, your sleep the night before...

Don't leave anything to chance. And by the way, unexpected events might still happen! But the more you prepare, the calmer and more relaxed you'll be and the better you'll be able to handle those unexpected events.

Remote control cars and memorable presentations

If you want your presentation to be informative and fun and memorable, take a lesson from the hosts of Top Gear.

It's a show about cars. And in the course of each show, various cars are driven, raced, analyzed, discussed and thoroughly examined.

However, the way the information is delivered is what makes it memorable. In every episode, the hosts find a way to show the cars' performance and features while also making a game out of driving the car.

Here are just a few examples of what they've done:

Raced full-size cars using remote controls

Raced three cars as far as they would go on one tank of gas

Raced a car to the top of a mountain against a rock climber climbing the cliff face

Raced a car to the airport against a boat and a bike

And one of my favorites: Placed one car on top of the other, with the steering wheel in one car and the brakes/accelerator in the other. Two drivers had to become one to race the car.

Sure, it's all silliness. But it gets your attention. It's entertaining. And you also learn a lot about the cars.

From driving the car around a race track to jumping it over a trailer, Top Gear takes a show about cars and makes it unusual, unpredictable and endlessly fascinating! Can your audiences say the same about your presentations?

Put yourself center stage

One of the problems with PowerPoint presentations is the belief that the PowerPoint IS the presentation, that the slides are more important than the speaker.

Here's another contributor to the problem: The placement of the screen.

In rooms where there's a fixed or permanent screen, it's almost always in the center of the front wall. This means that the speaker has to stand off to the side or, in small rooms, in the corner (I've spoken from the corner of the room many times!). Sometimes the speaker stands in front of the screen and slides play across his forehead...

This, of course, puts the slide show center stage and the speaker in a secondary position of importance.

If you are speaking in a venue where the screen is not fixed, ask for it to be placed in the corner or to the left of the speaker (who will take center stage) at an angle to the audience. When the screen is to the left of the speaker, it is then to the right of the audience, which makes it easier to flow visually from speaker to slides and back again.

If you must speak from the corner, try to seat the audience so that they are facing you, with the screen to their right. Just because the room is square or rectangular, there's no reason the audience has to sit square to the front wall.

Visit your venue in advance and clarify with the organizer where you will stand and the screen will be placed.

Don't give up your power to PowerPoint. Be the center of attention!